Privacy

Editorial Policy

Every article and headline on this website is satire, completely untrue and entirely false.

Privacy Policy

Welcome to our wacky world of privacy policies! Here at NZ Ferald, we take your privacy as seriously as a penguin takes flight lessons. So buckle up and get ready for a ride through the wild and wonderful world of online privacy.

What We Collect:

  • Your wildest dreams (just kidding, we wish!)
  • Basic information like your name, email address, and shoe size (because who doesn’t love a good shoe sale?)
  • Your browser information, because let’s face it, we’re nosy like that

How We Use Your Information:

  • To send you cat memes, because who doesn’t love a good LOLcat?
  • To personalize your experience and make you feel like the VIP you truly are
  • To improve our website and make it as smooth as a buttered dolphin riding a rainbow

Cookies: We love cookies. No, not the ones you eat (although those are pretty great too), but the tiny digital ones that help us track your online adventures. Don’t worry, we promise not to steal your cookie jar.

Sharing Your Information: We don’t share your information with anyone. Seriously, not even our own mothers. Your secrets are safe with us… unless you count that one time we accidentally tweeted your embarrassing childhood nickname. Oops.

Security: We’ve built Fort Knox around your data. Okay, not really, but we do take security seriously. We’ve got firewalls, encryption, and a team of highly-trained cyber ninjas ready to fend off any would-be hackers.

Changes to This Policy: We reserve the right to change this policy at any time. Because let’s face it, life is unpredictable, and sometimes we just need to roll with the punches. But don’t worry, we’ll always keep you in the loop… unless we forget.

Questions? If you have any questions about our privacy policy (or just want to say hi), feel free to reach out to our friendly support team. They’re standing by 24/7, ready to chat about anything from privacy concerns to the latest episode of The Great British Bake Off.